sex•u•al from Latin sexus sex
[1] of, relating to, or associated with sex or the sexes.
[2] having or involving sex.
sen•su•al from Latin sensus sense
[1] relating to or consisting in the gratification of the senses.
[2] devoted to or preoccupied with the senses or appetites.
I would not go as far as saying that sensuality and sexuality are exact opposites, but they are different and should be recognized as such.
Sensuality is “stroking the senses” — enlivening one’s imagination. It’s the finesse or natural tendencies one possesses and uses to arouse curiosity and intrigue in another. Sensuality is expressed or displayed in many ways: a voice, word, touch, smile, aroma, clothing, walk, gesture, kindness, even by being silently attentive to a person.
The most important and frequently mentioned sign of sensuality is attitude — an individual with a strong and positive mentality. They have an air of self-confidence, and that energy radiates for all to see. A sensuous partner never divulges every secret; they keep the thrill of the unknown alive.
We are living creatures; we all have senses. When we stroke these senses and hit the right notes, the song of sensuality is played. We dance and feel alive, vigorously stimulated and refreshed. Technically, there are five senses: sight, smell, taste, hearing, and touch. Then there’s the sixth sense, commonly called intuition. Proper stimulation of these senses can lead to heightened sensuality, as well as the pursuit of pleasure, and no, we are not talking about sex but, pleasure.
I like to believe that we are more than a room full of people dancing to the same song. I like to believe that we are a “community” of dancers. As any community conscious person can tell you, we are all individually responsible toward bettering the community as a whole. We must all do our part.
Sometimes a dance will get intimate. That’s fine. Intimate dancing is nice. But sometimes a dance gets downright dirty. A dirty dance can be hot, very hot…. However, there is a line. Just like public displays of affection, some is fine but too much is just gross and makes everyone else around you uncomfortable.
Remember that, dance, is never “wrong”, but any Social Dance is more than a dance. It’s also a community, and within a community, there are social constructs that will dictate what are or are not generally acceptable behaviours.
Sensuality in men is usually expressed through sexual gestures or comments. A man can even go so far as to say, “I never thought of sensuality as being masculine, only feminine. Due to this fact, men usually have a lot of work ahead of them. They are usually all out of tune with their sensuality.
In women, sensuality is usually expressed through a softer approach, caressing, along with an abundance of tenderness and affection. Sometimes all they want is to have fun while dancing. Two women speak of the pleasure, comfort and passion felt after dancing with a partner, receiving a full moment of pleasure, yet not being approached for sex. Once people understand the reality that there is a time and place for everything, everyone will be more fulfilled, thus more inclined to reciprocate. However, there is still a large number of women that cannot bring their sensuality outwards due to their self criticism.
I would suggest to first know yourself. What appeals to you and invigorates your senses? What notes cause you to dance and feel alive? What peeks your passion? Find these answers, and keep in mind that there are things you can do for yourself to bring about a feeling of sensuousness.
Remember that wearing tiny shorts, tops, transparencies or showing more parts of your body won’t make you more sensual but instead it will bring sexuality in the other people’s mind, which would be a completely opposite result, that can affect you in receiving a totally different approach from others beyond dancing!